GCSE: History Essays, Coursework and Assignments

"#1# The author answers the question very well, as he/she describes the impact of the Great Depression on Germany, very well, particularly in the first paragraph. He/she then goes on to describe the impact on the Nazi party, very well. The author goes further by explaining briefly Hitler’s ultimate steps to power, although this wasn’t explicitly asked for, it was still a good addition, as it demonstrated good knowledge, which a marker would reward. He/she shows extensive knowledge as well, which improves the standard of the answer, for instance the Nazi soup kitchens. #2# The question did not ask for any analysis, as it was merely an explain/ describe question, so the author should not need to do any analysis, however if they were to add point, like ‘the Great Depression was arguably the greatest factor in bringing Hitler to power, as it mobilized the masses to support him and defeated the incumbent government,’ it would surely do better, as it demonstrates good historical skills. Note, however that this should only be a sentence or two long, as the question is a describe question. The explanation is very good, and effectively describes all the impacts. #3# The spelling and grammar in this essay was good, an example to others writing a similar essay. I did not spot any spelling errors, or grammatical errors. Extra credit should be given for spelling Bruning’s name with the umlaut, as it demonstrates good knowledge as well as spelling. As this essay answers the question very well and the spelling and grammar was good, it has received full five stars. Personally, adding a sentence of analysis would have made this essay even better. "

"This essay goes into great detail, and its most bits I can take inspiration from, but other other bits are not very relevant to the question but overall great essay! "

"thankss :)"

"#1# The student has a clear structure and argument in the essay, however, the major flaw in the essay would be that they failed to completely ‘pull apart’ the essay question. By this, I mean fully interpret the essay question. There is no definition of what “German” is which is key to answering this question. Whilst it is apparent after reading the essay that “German” is only the Nazi’s view which excludes Jews and Gypsies (to name a few), it is not clear in the essay. However, this was a well-argued essay with strong evidence to support the argument. To improve, the student should have made more comparisons between what life was like in 1933 and 1939. This was done perfectly in the paragraph about the Jews but was less evident in the other paragraphs. Even though there is scope for improving the conclusion, it is sufficient for GCSE level. A conclusion still needs evidence to back up the student’s final judgement rather than just assertions of factors. #2# The student has included many points in their essay which has served them well. It created a strong and convincing argument. The flaw of not identifying at the beginning of the essay the meaning of “German” meant that the rest of the essay had to compensate for this. It is important to remember to ‘state the obvious’ at times, as this makes clear the point of view or line of argument that is taken in the essay. Otherwise, the question was well addressed. Very strong and relevant examples are used throughout the essay to support the argument. Whilst it could be said that there are too many points in each paragraph and not enough analysis, it is acceptable at GCSE level to do this and marks are not affected. The most important thing is that the evidence used is all relevant. An appropriate and strong conclusion was made. This was mainly due to clear and well supported paragraphs throughout the essay which naturally flowed to the conclusion. #3# The spelling and grammar are both fine, however the punctuation (specifically the usage of capital letters for events such as ‘The Night of the Long Knives’) needs a little attention. Such issues should not be arising at GCSE level – this would put the student’s work into the lower levels of a grade rather than in the higher level of a grade. The appropriate terms were used where necessary (such as names of groups e.g. the SS) and a clear understanding was shown for what the terms meant. Interestingly, the essay doesn’t seem to have an introduction which I think has done this student a favour. The omission of the introduction means that the essay launches straight into addressing the question which at GCSE level is perfectly acceptable. Only a solid conclusion is absolutely necessary and whilst the conclusion has scope for improvement, the argument naturally brought the conclusion into the essay without it being disjointed. "

"Concise writer, easy to follow and make notes from. Far more general introduction & useful for any student studying prohibition compared to other essays found so far. "