GCSE: English Literature: Drama: By Author: Arthur Miller Coursework

"This was a fair atempt. However the writer is taking a fairly limited view e.g. she compares it with the recent events pertaining to Taliban in Afganistan which for some is a holy war. I think there is a wider issue which serves as a warning when 'any' goverment gets too powerful and suppresses the freedom of the individual. Apart from that the essay contains some errors e.g. : ...Proctor admitted to lechery but Elizabeth doesn't...' This would suggest that Elizabeth committed letchery too, which she did not. Later on the writer says something to the effect that this was a 'love story' - when most certainly it was not! For Example when Abigail says to John " I can feel your heat' that's pure sex. What's being expressed here is the sexual tension that existed between them, not love."

"5* - Excellent essay"

"very good explanation of the storyline"

"This needs a LOT of work, I'm afraid. The most pressing issue is probably the atrocious level of grammar evident in this piece. Not only are there numerous typo's, but certain phrases are very awkward to read and are fairly redundant as you're repeating what you've already stated. You also seem to invent a new word - 'thez' - near the conclusion of the essay which is brave, but unnecessary. You also don't really answer the question. There are glimpses of an attempt throughout the essay, but ultimately it just feels like you're repeating the story to me. Assume the reader has ALREADY read Romeo and Juliet and knows what's going on in the story, then go from there. A good starting point would be to define 'dramatic tension', as that gives you a base to refer back to. Another tip is to use the P.E.E method of analysis. That is, give your POINT, then back it up with EVIDENCE (a quotation - something else that's lacking here) and then EXPLAIN how that quote supports your point. Now, ideally, you'd want the essay STRUCTURE to be something like: INTRO, POINT 1, POINT 2, POINT 3, CONCLUSION. The introduction will set the scene for the essay, then you lunge into the meat of it, before drawing it all together in the conclusion to summarise what you've said. I'm going to be frank, you'd probably be better starting from scratch here. TSR User: chidona"

"Its good."